Drinking Cold Buds on Mars?
Why not just take the next rocket to that holiday resort there? Sure, it’s a long journey but the vistas are breath-taking. In fact, not just the vistas, the atmosphere too!
With 95{154653b9ea5f83bbbf00f55de12e21cba2da5b4b158a426ee0e27ae0c1b44117} carbon dioxide in the Martian atmosphere (on earth, some folks are screaming hell and murder about 0.04{154653b9ea5f83bbbf00f55de12e21cba2da5b4b158a426ee0e27ae0c1b44117} of that), and no oxygen to speak of in the atmosphere on Mars (vs. 21{154653b9ea5f83bbbf00f55de12e21cba2da5b4b158a426ee0e27ae0c1b44117} on earth), one may ask what gives?
Is the promised future really here already, or are we looking at wholly unrealistic daydreams of some deluded minds?
Daydreams
Everyone has some daydreams, at least once in a while, here and there. On balance though, there isn’t much time for such for most people in the workforce. Social media connections alone already are taking up most of your “spare” time as it is. Getting your nouveau Martian vacation organized would certainly exceed the current constraints. So, it needs a longer time to plan for that. In fact, that may work out to be in your favor.
Don’t rush into things. With next to no inflation to speak of, international prices for crude oil, natural gas and coal at multi-year lows, it’s an opportune time to plan ahead, 10, 50, or even 1,000 years ahead! Even if you can’t sip that draft yourself then, just think of the pleasure your offspring or other beneficiary of your prepaid ticket to Mars may enjoy.
I’ll admit, daydreaming can be dangerous too. We are living now and on earth, not in a futuristic dream world. Without a reference to that here and now, such dreams can only be misleading and cause great disappointment later. One of the facts of life is that all life needs water, even the bubbling “suds” do!
The Suds
Wikipedia claims that “Beer is the oldest and most widely consumed alcoholic drink in the world, and the third most popular drink overall after water and tea.” It’s been “brewed” for over 10,000 years, simply by natural fermentation of wet grains like barley, oats, rye, wheat, and the like. Essentially all fruits and vegetables contain a form of sugar that undergoes fermentation to produce alcohol under the right conditions. To make good beer, one needs one more ingredient, namely the flower buds of the hop plant (Humulus lupulus). That ingredient provides the particular zesty taste of beer.
The hop plant is an important agricultural commodity, especially in the southern State of Bavaria in Germany. The area known as Hallertau in the lowlands of the upper part of the River Danube in Bavaria produces nearly a third of the world’s consumption of hops.
Now, I understand, sipping hop-suds may not be everyone’s favored past-time. Some folks may prefer “mountain spring water” (even if it comes from a nearby “whatchama call-it”). Its typical packaging, complete with picture of wholesome blue water alone must be worth the taste of purity claimed by the purveyors for you to experience. Yet others, perhaps with more refined taste-buds (as opposed to the other “Buds”), are relishing the kind of fermented stuff that’s most commonly sold in green glass bottles. Those, too, come with fanciful decorations, pictures of beautiful landscapes, and other gimmicks. Permit me to say: If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, the same adage should apply to taste.
But I’m getting off the topic, namely our planetary neighbor, planet Mars, where you can find such concretions as “cannonballs,” derisively also known as “blueberries”.
Mars
Mars has been in the news on and off for years, ever since former U.S. President Obama announced his plans with the statement “We have set a clear goal vital to the next chapter of America’s story in space: sending humans to Mars by the 2030s and returning them safely to Earth …” Obviously, a clear message.
Before your holiday trip to that (b/s)uds-enriched resort on Mars, a few minor wrinkles need to be ironed out. They may become apparent from the fact that, by now, it’s well over four decades since any human has set foot on that much closer space rock commonly known as the Moon. The difficulties to reach just that much closer desolate body in the universe and safely return to earth have not changed in that time. In comparison, going to and returning from Mars will be more difficult (and expensive) by several orders of magnitude. Still, planning ahead is a good trait.
As it so happened, just noticed more exciting news on “Martians,” right here on earth: As scientists from the Wageningen University and Research Centre, Netherlands, report that the “First ‘Martian worms” born in a lab could be the answer to growing crops on the red planet.” Those Martian suds may even come with some free (??) and tasty (??) munchies too!
Before you book your flight though, a bit of (definitely free) advice:
You may have to wait a good while longer before enjoying that cool beer on Mars.
Dr. Klaus L.E. Kaiser Scientist and author,
After receiving his doctorate in chemistry from the Technical University Munich, he joined Environment Canada’s National Water Research Institute where he served as research scientist and project manager for several research groups. He represented the institute at a variety of national and international committees, gave numerous presentations at scientific conferences, was editorial board member and peer reviewer for several journals, adjunct professor and external reviewer of university theses, and was the Editor-in- Chief of the the Water Quality Research Journal of Canada for nearly ten years.
Dr. Kaiser is an author of nearly 300 publications in scientific journals, government and national and international agency reports, books, trade magazines, and newspapers. He has been president of the Intl. Association for Great Lakes Research, and is a recipient of the Intl. QSAR Award. He is currently Director of Research of TerraBase Inc., and is a Fellow of the Chemical Institute of Canada.
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